Spiritual Asperger’s

We had been praying for the niece of a friend of mine who has Asperger syndrome.  I needed more information so I had looked up the syndrome on Wikipedia, that’s when I had one of those “click, click, click” moments.  For the first time in my life, my brilliant, but socially inept father began to make more sense.

My father had graduated near the top of his class from Cooper Union with a degree in Chemical Engineering.  His IQ was very high, but he had great difficulty keeping a job.  He was never comfortable in social settings, had no close relationships, and had difficulty relating to his three children, and his grandchildren.

As I read about the syndrome, so many of the symptoms fit my father.  Suddenly a great number of what I had considered “failures” on his part, as a husband, and as a father, were now explainable.  I have often wondered, since then, if that diagnosis had been available to my father (and perhaps more importantly, to my mother) how different life might have been for them, and for their children.  I wonder if, knowing how his brain was wired slightly differently than the typical, acceptable, socially interactive person, if my father couldn’t have learned to compensate for his “difficulties in social interaction” (Wikipedia).  And I wonder if my mother had understood her husband’s difficulty, if she couldn’t have helped him overcome, or perhaps the better word is compensate, some of his social difficulties.

One of the results of my dad’s ineptness were the several times we made significant moves to new states, new schools, new situations.  Several of those moves were difficult for all of us - tho, as I look back now, I see how God has used those moves to teach me many things.  It also meant the loss of income, once for more than two years, which was very hard for our mother.

As Bill and I continue to read our way through the Old Testament, we see over and over that the Children of Israel drift away from God.  How easily they forget to honor him with their entire being.  As a result, they are constantly “suffering” the consequences and the steps God has to take to bring them back into a relationship with himself.

Every morning (well, almost every morning) before I get out of bed I ask God to show me this day what He wants me to see, learn, discover and to use me as He chooses.  But I have yet to have a day when I successfully follow my own desire to walk with Him fully that day.  Like the Israelites of old, I have a form of Spiritual Asbergers.  I quickly lose my sensitivity to God’s presence and interaction in my life.

Even before the Israelites enter “the promised land” they are told how they are to interact (and often NOT interact) with the people living in the land who worshiped (often in despicable ways) “other gods”.  It is almost shocking how quickly they forget Moses’ and Joshua’s oft repeated instructions on how they are to behave once they enter the land. 

As I have often said, both in this blog and often in public, Jesus distilled the Old Testament law into two very simple “rules” – love God with our entire being, love others as ourselves.  So each morning, I also purpose that I will do better this day in loving others.  It seems to last until I go out the door and enter the world of people.  I confess that I do not do well when someone cuts me off in traffic.  Bill and I avoid watching the news on TV because it is often very upsetting when we hear the way people treat each other.  Even within the church I often struggle, within myself, with those who see life differently than I do.

As human beings, as yet to be perfected people, we suffer from Spiritual Aspergers, and have to learn to overcome it, to compensate.  But we are also are in that lifelong path of being transformed by God.  Like the Israelites of old, we too stray and have to be brought back.  We too have to be regularly reminded what it means to walk daily with God and to view others as He views them.  Our Spiritual Aspergers can be transformed from “difficulties in social interaction” to a God given sensitivity to begin to see Him as He is and to see others as God desires us to see them.  May we ever rejoice in the transformation process that is at work in our lives.       amen